Saturday, March 11, 2006

Moving - Vol. 1 Issue 1

Okay, so the Man, the MRD and I are moving about four hours north of here at the end of May. It's the Packrats v. the Anal Rentitives. My sister-in-law once told me, it takes three big moves to get rid of all the crap that your husband has accumulated over time that is now worthless. And, I'm not talking about sentimental football jerseys. I'm okay with's an excuse to go to the Container Store and by a proper storage box. We're talking about USELESS STUFF. The Man sometimes forgets that he does not live in the Depression Era. He also forgets that he is not mechanically inclined. So our garage has a bunch of stuff that is TRULY USELESS. He cannot fix or repair any of the items. Nor will he have any of them repaired. Let's face it, they've been in the garage for five years without being fixed. What's going to change that now? Here's the top ten list on my hit parade. It might get ugly. We might have to distract him with some kind of hunting trip where he leaves town or get him a shiney new toy. But I swear, these things are going to get thrown out, one way or another.

1. Golf shoes that do not fit.
2. Anchoring rope for a yacht.
3. Broken adding machine.
4. Broken 3-ton television.
5. Clothes that are two sizes too large or small, or have holes or stains.
6. Socks with holes.
7. A ten year old cell phone.
8. 10 years worth of hunting magazines.
9. Tangled fishing line.
10. 27 empty gatorade bottles.

If we can survive this without getting divorced, we can survive anything!


Blogger Mignon said...

My husband was distracted by the cash rolling in from our garage sale. And we got rid of #s 1, 2 (not a yacht, more like a dingy), 4, 5 and 7. He was all nay-saying until someone offered us $50 for a broken bicycle. Good luck!

2:16 PM  
Blogger Shrinking Violet said...

We don't own a yacht, boat or FLOTATION DEVICE OF ANY KIND. And yet we have this giant shipping rope thing. Ahoy Mate--y!!!

4:57 AM  
Blogger Ditsy Chick said...

I stayed home a week after we moved and a suprising number of my husbands crap, er, stuff disapeared. He did not even firgure out most of it was gone...

9:29 PM  
Blogger Tink said...

It must be a male thing. I'm with Ditsy! Sneak them out in pieces and he'll never know. :)

9:00 AM  
Blogger Brooke said...

Moving is a major pain in the butt. Congrats on getting through it...broken tv or not!

7:23 PM  
Blogger Dan said...

It's scary, but I think I agree with you.

Sneaking them out can backfire though.

10:05 PM  
Anonymous TB said...

Oh my god. I can feel your pain. Jeff is the SAME way. It drives me nuts. Sometimes when he goes out of town I "accidentally" take some of his old, unused stuff to the Goodwill.
The crazy thing is he never misses it.

Good luck getting packed up, I'll be right there with you soon.

12:20 PM  
Blogger The Gradual Gardener said...

Pack boxes of Kitchenware and mark them "Empty Gatorade Bottles." When you get to the new place, unpack those boxes yourself, and when he looks for his stuff feign innocence and say, "I wonder what happened, maybe the moving company lost them."

12:44 PM  
Blogger DebbieDoesLife said...

married to a packrat myself. My condolences.

6:17 PM  
Blogger Tink said...

Hellllloooooo. Where are you?

8:28 AM  
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